The Zombie Rights Campaign Blog

“Zombie Burger + Drink Lab” Sadly Seems Anti-Zombie After All

We previously mentioned what seemed like great news for a Zombie-themed, and perhaps even Zombie Friendly burger restaurant opening in Des Moines.

Well, the grand opening fast approaches, and alas, while the Zombie theme is intact, the Zombie Friendliness seems to be absent:

With seating for more than 100 on its sidewalk patio, the restaurant’s interior will have an apocalyptic décor featuring classic movie posters and custom murals of zombies attacking Des Moines. Food will be served until 2 a.m. Sunday through Thursday and 3 a.m. Friday and Saturday.

Anti-Zombie murals? Really? Awww.. come on! I was looking forward to going there some weekend!

I’m seriously and legitimately bummed out here. The restaurant sounded neat, the food sounded amazing:

The beef will be ground in-house. Burgers will be cooked on a custom-made grill with a press designed to bash the burgers and create an exterior with a crusty char. In all, there will be about 20 burger combinations on the menu and 80 sandwich mixes, including hot dogs, chicken breasts and an array of vegetarian selections such as veggie burgers and portobello mushroom caps.

Alas, even the probably-delicious food will be themed in such a way as to make Zombies uncomfortable:

The “They’re coming to get you, Barbara” burger has cheese, bacon, caramelized onions and two grilled-cheese sandwiches instead of a bun.

Ironically this burger could instantly give any Living patron a massive coronary, so driving off the Zombie patrons is a questionable move:

Good grief you can feel your valves clogging just looking at it.

So ends the dream of a Zombie-themed, Zombie Friendly place to grab a great burger, at least for now.

For shame. For shame, and what a shame!

The Zombie Burger + Drink Lab apparently opens at 11 am on Tuesday, and breaks my heart about the same time.


About The Author

The role of 'Administrator' will be played tonight by John Sears, currently serving as President of The Zombie Rights Campaign.

Comments

2 Responses to ““Zombie Burger + Drink Lab” Sadly Seems Anti-Zombie After All”

  1. RobHeathers says:

    If it helps, all their food is VERY salty to help preserve you.

    The Undead Elvis, with a side order of fried Brussels Sprouts & a Bloody Mary are fantastic on a wicked hot & humid day.

  2. [...] They’re coming to get you Barbara Burger. Image: The Zombie Rights Campaign [...]

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