Sometimes we get a bit of gentle ribbing from the various ZRC Friends in the Horror news biz, since we have such a singular mission and focus, and so I had a bit of advance warning about this slightly… satirical take on a new Think Geek Anti-Zombie product coming out:

And now a tasty little treat for our readers who are undead (or those of you who have pet zombies) – brains on a stick! While some out there may try to talk you into believing that zombies don’t love eating brains there are centuries of recorded proof that state quite the opposite. if you want to treat the zombies right treat them with a brain lollipop!

Har-har, BuyZombie. First, you can’t keep a Zombie as a *pet*; the proper term is ‘kidnapping victim’ or perhaps ‘slave’. Word to the wise.

(Though you can of course have Zombie Pets, like Patches the Zom-dog; that’s another matter entirely)

Think Geek of course is behind this product, as one might expect:

Suck a B!
A lollipop for the zombie fighting to eat their way out of all of us.
Sour apple flavored.
Braaaains.

Let’s get this straight, one (hopefully, if there is a God) last time: not all Zombies eat brain, or prefer brain, and certainly not all Zombies are fixated on braaaaaains.

Where does this hateful meme come from? Not George Romero:

Vanity Fair: Zombies have a weird fixation with eating human flesh and brains. What is it about being undead that makes somebody so ravenous?

Romero: First of all, why does everybody say that zombies eat brains?

VF: Because… it’s true?

Romero: I’ve never had a zombie eat a brain! I don’t know where that comes from. Who says zombies eat brains?

VF: I remember brains being a big zombie menu item in Return of the Living Dead back in the mid-80s, but I’m not sure if that’s where it started.

Romero: Whenever I sign autographs, they always ask me, “Write ‘Eat Brains’!” I don’t understand what that means. I’ve never had a zombie eat a brain. But it’s become this landmark thing.

Indeed, the meme actually dates ALL THE WAY BACK TO… 1985, with the release of ‘Return of the Living Dead’, which was the work of Dan O’Bannon and, slightly, John Russo, co-creator of ‘Night of the Living Dead’.

That’s it. I’ve traveled far and wide, researched extensively, consulted the ZRC’s Cultural Historian and talked with numerous very knowledgeable horror fans and people in the indie horror industry, and *nobody* knows of an example of allegedly brain-fixated Zombies before 1985 and ‘Return of the Living Dead’.

So I feel safe making a bet and a challenge: the first person who can find a prominent example of brain-fixated Zombies in fiction (which is where you’d have to look) from before ‘Return of the Living Dead’, the ZRC will give to them a prize package consisting of one of everything we sell.

One Lurch for the Cure Shirt, any size, either color. A wristband. A ‘Zombies Forever’ print, signed. A copy of Zombie Cafe. A copy of ‘Helpless’. Retail that’s a prize package worth over 40 dollars; to you, free, with free shipping.

All you have to do is find a plausible alternative source for the stereotype that Zombies are driven to devour braaaaaains.

The rules: The first person (or persons) to present us with a major studio film, broadcast television show, published novel, novella, short story or serial from a major author that shows Zombies behaving in the stereotypical brain-obsessed way seen in ‘Return of the Living Dead’ and now in popular consciousness gets the prize package, free of charge, freely shipped to them.

In other words, show me another way that this story got started in America/The West and win yourself some swag. If the Evidence is out of print we will have to work out a method of verification, of course :D

Contest is open to anyone in the United States or Canada. (Actually, it’s open to anyone on Earth but we only want to ship to the U.S. or Canada. Not because of costs, but because, yikes it’s getting hard to do international shipping reliably. It took literally months to import ‘Zombie Hotel’ from the UK, and I’ve heard that shipping to Mexico is a real… adventure currently. Wouldn’t want to guess what it’d be like to send to Australia.)

Should be an easy win for our pals at BuyZombie, what with their ‘centuries of recorded proof’ and all.

Unless they were.. bluffing?

Tags: Anti-Zombie Products, Romero, Social Justice

This entry was posted by John Sears on Wednesday, May 4th, 2011 at 11:20 pm and is filed under Zombie Media. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.