Repent, Sinners: Fifth Resident Evil Movie Confirmed, ‘Inspiration’ Apparently Involves Gaming Marathon
Not to get all religious on you or anything, so close to the alleged apocalypse, but the fifth ‘Resident Evil’ movie has just been confirmed, proving once and for all the existence of evil incarnate in the world at large, and I think it’s time for us to prepare for our doom:
First, she confirms that she will be returning as “Alice” and that she “thinks” that the official title is Resident Evil: Retribution, while also adding, “but i have to ask paul 2 b sure.”
Paul would be her husband, Paul W.S. Anderson, who directed the first and final installments. She confirms his involvement, but solely as a writer at the moment. For hardcore fans, you’ll be happy to know that he’s at least “trying”: “jst 2 let the RE fans know, cause there’s been a bunch of questions abt the nxt film, paul has kids that are proffessional players… all they do is play the games till they master every level and unlock every code. they play the games for WEEKS and give paul the footage.” She continues, “He’s literally watching days of the most awesome RE players out there to get inspiration 4 the nxt installment of the franchise.”
There’s nothing like having children play a videogame franchise to help you write a winning screenplay.
Literally, because that is about the worst possible idea for a brainstorming session in the history of film, literature or human thought.
This surely is a sign that the end is nigh. Or, to get biblical:
And I beheld when he had opened the sixth seal, and, lo, there was a great earthquake; and the sun became black as sackcloth of hair, and the moon became as blood;
I kid, I kid, and at any rate, the only proper response to such an outrage is defiance, so, here’s that video of the ZRC burning RE: Afterlife in effigy again:
Down with Smirky. Up with Zombies!
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