Keep in mind at the outset that everything in this review stems from a perusal of the sample material from ‘Every Zombie Eats Somebody Sometime’ available here; I have not, nor will I ever, read the full book, unless I am somehow abducted and forced into an Orwellian nightmare of interrogation, at which point, this book might well be in my personal Room 101.

Let’s start with the obvious: ‘Every Zombie Eats Somebody Sometime’ is a very Anti-Zombie book, full of negative stereotypes and hateful imagery. If you had any doubt that it was written by a backward, retrograde Living Supremacist, let me assure you the introduction puts any such fears to rest:

That level of hatred is rare, even in our unenlightened age, and it’s usually fashionable to at least *pretend* you’re forced, somehow, into your distaste for the Differently Animated.

Whereas Michael P. Spradlin, author of this odious tome, wears it as a badge of pride.

If you’re thinking that maybe this hatred at least inspires some highly original comedic material, I think I can put that fear to rest as well:

Yes, Keith Richards is a Zombie, because he looks somewhat gaunt, har har har.

Hilarious!

For the record, if Mr. Richards did happen to be a Zombie, and we have no evidence to that effect here at The Zombie Rights Campaign, we would in fact be very happy to welcome him to the movement. I mean, can you imagine the PSAs we could do? An enormously talented, famous musician, not to mention a wealthy potential patron for The Cause? Sweet.

Ok, you might argue, what about the actual ‘songs’?

Well, first, they’re not very good. I read better filk parodies for free on the Skin Horse archives/discussion page at Webcomics Nation, on a regular basis.

Second, they’re viciously Anti-Zombie in much the same way as the introduction. Take a peek:

Yeah.. wow. Can you imagine plunking down hard-earned money for that?

From the sample alone (and I dearly thank the publisher, if not for actually printing this thing, then at least for sparing me any need whatsoever to *purchase* it), the ZRC feels comfortable in giving the book a rating, if not for its complete content then for its readily apparent Anti-Zombie stance.

Thus, ‘Every Zombie Eats Somebody Sometime’ earns our mark of shame and opprobrium, the dreaded Living Supremacist rating.

If you listen closely I think you can hear Mr. Spradlin furiously typing away at his next sad attempt to cash-in on the current Anti-Zombie craze. Perhaps a cookbook is in order? I mean, you can just crib the recipes from public domain works then give them Zombified names and..

Wait. Why am I helping? Forget I said that last bit.

Tags: Anti-Zombie Products, Books, Mainstream Media, Zombie Flavored Creativity Substitute

This entry was posted by John Sears on Tuesday, February 1st, 2011 at 12:57 am and is filed under Zombie Media. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.