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We hope you'll find this blog an educational, entertaining, and inspiring source of information, whether you're recently undead, a long-time member of the differently animated, or a still-living friend of your fallen, yet risen again, brethren. Everyone with an interest in zombie rights is welcome!

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ZRC Reviews: Cabine of the Dead

Posted By on November 8, 2010

Cabine of the Dead proved to be a great disappointment to The Zombie Rights Campaign, at least relative to our earlier fond hopes for a stirring realist piece of cinema depicting the struggles of the Differently Animated to gain fair and equal access to public services or the use of facilities normally open to the public, in this case, a phone booth.

Rather than being such an expose, ‘Cabine of the Dead’ is a slickly produced, shot and acted short in the vein of Shaun of the Dead, mixing Romero-style Zombies with a comedy of errors as the protagonist tries, and fails, to get help from his circle of friends and acquaintances over the phone.

Is this a social commentary on contemporary life in France? Are the Zombies being used here as a metaphor for social disconnectedness in the modern age? What is the significance of the phone booth in an era utterly dominated by cellular phones, anyway?

I mean, when’s the last time you saw a fully operational, well-maintained phone booth?

These are perhaps all interesting questions (in a film theory, abstract sort of way) but not the ZRC’s focus; we are concerned not with the use of Zombies as some sort of symbol, but to the treatment of the Zombie condition by the filmmaker, and here things are far less ambiguous: ‘Cabine of the Dead’ is NOT Zombie Friendly. No sir.

Why must so many aspiring filmmakers use Zombies as set decorations? Zombies are people too, not mere objects or automatons to place your *important*, i.e. LIVING, characters in peril, or merely on hand to advance the plot. I mean, for pity’s sake, even George Romero and John Russo had Zombie characters in their major anti-Zombie films, albeit in an Amos and Andy, token, not-quite-real-people sort of way (and of course Romero pulled a complete 180, having utilized fully realized individual Zombie characters in Creepshow).

For ‘Cabine of the Dead’, the Zombies are just something to keep Patrick in his little well-lit booth and to make him dependent on others for his survival; in an alternate universe, they might be rabid dogs or a flock of angry birds. We never learn what these Zombies could want, why they’re after Patrick, or where they eventually go. We never get explanations or backstory on these important character elements, any more than you get details on a storm that forces a movie hero to take shelter under an awning; astonishingly, the hows and whys of Zombiism don’t matter, so long as the set is dressed and the stress applied.

Incredibly exploitative.

In addition, as mentioned above, these movie-Zoms fall into the same old Romero tropes, shambling, groaning, ravenous flesh-eaters entirely fixated on devouring the people graced with speaking roles. They are used and yet not used, employed and forgotten, tossed aside when no longer needed, forced to reinforce all the old prejudices and intolerances along the way.

For all of these reasons, and for repeatedly presenting violent altercation as the only reasonable course of action for interaction with the Differently Animated, the ZRC is forced to give ‘Cabine of the Dead’ our worst rating, that of being Living Supremacist.

France can now join the sad list of nations that actively produces and exports anti-Zombie propaganda. For shame.

Cabine of the Dead has earned this stinging rebuke.

Last Warning to Mega64 Trolls

Posted By on November 8, 2010

It’s been fun, but this is getting old. Outright obscene comments will be removed at my sole discretion; attempts at intimidation or backhanded violent threats won’t be tolerated either, and may be forwarded to your ISP/college or the relevant authorities, again at my sole discretion.

I honestly can’t believe I have to deal with this kind of nonsense on the ZRC. As a group you are the sorriest bunch of whiny, hypersensitive crybabies I have ever had the misfortune to deal with.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I have actual work to do.

Open Letter to City of Madison Wisconsin Mayor Dave Cieslewicz

Posted By on November 7, 2010

Mayor Cieslewicz,

I am writing to you at this time, after having gathered my thoughts on the matter, to express my dismay, as well as the dismay of our group at the rapidly deteriorating experience that has become the annual ‘Freakfest’ event here in Madison. I moved to this city two years ago now, and so, being a fan of Halloween in general, I have attended three consecutive, city-affiliated Halloween events on State Street.

I can say, without doubt and without reservation, that each year has been progressively worse than the last, but that this last year’s poorly, arbitrarily and chaotically managed free for all has soured us on the entire affair and seems on track, regretfully, to eliminate one of Madison’s most striking and vibrant annual traditions.

I’m not in a position to comment on how Halloween was managed before the City became directly involved, as I did not live here at the time, and I am sympathetic to the need to maintain public order and contain costs, however, the current management is simply not working, unless the plan is to snuff out our city’s celebration of the holiday entirely.

The first year we went to Freakfest, it was amazing. The crowds, the costumes, actual groups of performers with elaborate displays on stilts, true works of art. The next year, security guards began arbitrarily confiscating ‘contraband’, which included, bizarrely, bottles of water for thirsty patrons, searching my camera bag for.. I’m not even sure what… and generally harassing entrants to State Street. There was an oppressive and unfriendly air beginning to coalesce around the event.

However, it was nothing compared to this year. Having learned from our mistake last year of daring to bring a bottle of water (plastic, naturally) that had been opened, and been informed that said bottle represented some existential threat to public safety, we brought a sealed, unopened, mint bottle of Dasani.. which was ‘confiscated’, or perhaps the better word is stolen, from us upon entry. Our costumes, if you want to call them that, consisting of the same picket signs we have used for three consecutive years at events around Wisconsin, Illinois and Indiana without incident, were taken from us, unless we were wiling to dismantle the ‘dangerous’ elements of.. yard sticks. Given away by the Indiana Department of Veterans Affairs, as a matter of fact. At a large public event, attended by small children, that is known as, well.. the Indiana State Fair.

I’m sure the VA would be shocked to know that their freebies constitute weapons in a nearby state.

At no point prior to the event could I find, or was I informed of, the confiscation and safety policies that were attached to this event. Our every attempt at compliance was met with ever more elaborate and arbitrarily enforced rules, seemingly implemented solely to stifle creativity.

Once we got inside, it only got worse. Having been denied all access to beverages of our own, we found a nearly complete lack of food service or available vending, unlike in previous years. All the restaurants were absolutely mobbed; there was simply nowhere to get a drink most of the evening, let alone edible food.

Toilet facilities? Don’t make me laugh. I saw precisely one portable toilet with a block long line. Thanks but no thanks.

As for the much-vaunted musical acts, OK Go didn’t begin to perform until after midnight, late, and only did a very short set. Most of the time the main stage was vacant throughout the evening. People wandered about, briefly, plainly and obviously bored, and then left.

The crowds, subjectively, seemed much lighter than usual, and consisted predominately not of artists displaying their craftsmanship and competitive spirit, as in previous years, but in undergraduates stumbling around under the influence (perhaps having gotten their liquor off-site, perhaps not) in cheap store-bought costumes.

Every year since I moved here I have begged, implored, wheedled and cajoled out of state friends that they should make the trip to see our city on Halloween.

That won’t be occurring after this year’s disaster. I hope things improve, but I am very doubtful.

Your constituent,

John J Sears
President of The Zombie Rights Campaign
www.zombierightscampaign.org

Previous ZRC Coverage of the Freakfest 2010 Event can be seen here, here, here and here.

ZRC Reviews: Chemical 12-D

Posted By on November 7, 2010

The Zombie Rights Campaign saw this film at the Drunken Zombie Film Festival, and I have to admit, found it extremely disturbing indeed, graphic and unrelenting in the horrors it demonstrates and the complicated moral dilemmas it poses for Zombie Rights.

A basic synopsis, obtained from the filmmaker’s website:

Chemical 12-D is the latest short from Water Cooler Productions that has begun circulation in the film festival world as well as begun its hype online. Written and directed by Mac Eldridge, Chemical 12-D focuses on Michael Frank, a lone scientist trying to find the cure in a world that has been plagued by infection. Chemical 12-D is about Michael Frank and what happens as he searches for this cure that both he and the world is trying to discover.

The entire film is available on Youtube and will be embedded, behind a cut to shield impressionable individuals from the terrifying imagery.

How does Chemical 12-D fare from the perspective of Undead Equality? To start with, Michael Frank’s manic quest to find a ‘cure’ for a world plagued by ‘infection’ is conveyed quite well as the monomaniacal quest for scientific achievement at any cost, and without letting any obstacles or empathy stand in his way. Frank starts the film by stalking a neighborhood in his car, searching for a recently ‘mutated’ individual, by which the movie means a Zombie, so that he can experiment upon them in his gruesome ad hoc laboratory. Tragically, and unfortunately, he finds his prey in the form of a young, elementary school age Zombie who has been (somewhat callously) yoked out in his front yard with a dog collar on a chain.

On the one hand, this treatment of a child by their parent or caregiver, seemingly for merely being a Zombie, seems unjust and discriminatory, but to be perfectly fair, I’ve seen Living parents put their Living children on not-entirely-dissimilar leashes in malls and parks, and the state doesn’t choose to take their offspring away, so perhaps it’s more innocent than it seems at first glance.

Regardless of the issue of neglect, our sinister mad scientist drugs and abducts the small child, innocent of all wrongdoing and helpless, to take back to his house of horrors and perform a series of gruesome experiments upon the waif. Lest anyone get any sympathetic ideas about this individual’s quest for a ‘cure’, the dispassionate and horrifyingly cold depiction of his malignant pursuit of knowledge, culminating with a truly ghastly vivisection scene, puts those inclinations to rest.

I will not spoil the ending, except to note that it gives a Zombie Rights Campaigner something serious to think over and makes a significant impact for a short film.

Much like A Serbian Film, which we saw at the Horror Society Film Festival, this short intentionally barrages the viewer with moral ambiguity and realistic, gruesome, disgusting – even to the point of nauseating – visceral horror. Unlike with A Serbian Film, it’s not quite as clear that the filmmakers, however, are pursuing any grander statement or vision. Is this horror for its own sake? Is it merely here to sicken? Is that enough? Is a harsh and unflinching portrayal of the actions taken by Anti-Zombie forces socially redeeming enough to justify the depiction and pre-enactment of such rampages on film for audiences?

I’m not entirely certain. For these reasons, and because of the tense and extremely unsettling subject matter, The Zombie Rights Campaign has decided to award this film a Zombie Neutral rating. The story shown here is definitely not Zombie Friendly, and the actions of its alleged protagonist are Living Supremacist in the extreme, but, we can only hope, the filmmakers are endeavoring to illustrate the depths to which Living Supremacists sink in pursuit of their awful goals for a nobler purpose.

We leave it to the viewer to decide what this film means to them with regard to Undead Equality.

To watch this disturbing piece of cinema yourself, look behind this cut:
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ZRC Reviews: ‘Zombie Apocalypse’ Music Video by Kirby Krackle

Posted By on November 7, 2010

Geeky rock personalities just can’t seem to stay away from bashing the Undead. Jonathon Coulton famously made his bones with ‘Re: Your Brains’, now Kirby Krackle puts out an animated video to accompany their song ‘Zombie Apocalypse’, featuring many hateful and negative stereotypes about the Differently Animated.

From a Zombie Rights perspective this video is a borderline atrocity. The main character seen in the video, through the course of the song, abandons his friends, his civilization, and even his family to hide himself away as crude caricatures of the Differently Animated tear through the city streets, devouring the living and shambling slowly about in search of fresh human food (your standard Romero scenario).

Shockingly, said individual displays wanton prejudice in rejecting his friend who comes all the way for a visit merely because he has become Undead on the trip across town with a glib remark about a small patch of missing flesh around his friend’s jaw; is friendship only skin for Kirby Krackle?

Even worse, if one can believe it, the protagonist executes his own parents merely for joining the Zombie community, burying them in the backyard. Matricide? Patricide? Truly grotesque!

For these reasons the ZRC is forced to award this catchy music video/hate crime our lowest rating, the ‘Living Supremacist’ designation. For shame, Kirky Krackle. For shame.

This music video and song have both been rated ‘LS’ for ‘Living Supremacist’ by The Zombie Rights Campaign.

Shame on you, Kirky Krackle

The ZRC Visits the Drunken Zombie Film Festival

Posted By on November 7, 2010

So, before I could realize that I had apparently inflamed the tender egos of much of the nerdy world with a brief post dissing a silly video bashing Zombies, the Zombie Rights Campaign went on a trip to cloudy, grey Peoria, Illinois to see some short films in the Drunken Zombie Film Festival.

This marks our least productive travel time to outreach time ever, I think; 2 hours of shorts, 7 hours of driving. Huzzah for efficiency!

On the other hand, we did get to see a few new films, a few classics from previous festivals (unrelated to Zombies), and caught Cabine of the Dead again; no, repeat viewing doesn’t improve it, I’m afraid.

I’m working on reviews of all the Zombie-related shorts as we speak; in the meantime, have some pictures from the trip below the cut:
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Security Updates

Posted By on November 7, 2010

Due to some fairly harmless attempts to spam our pages with garbage from one particular Mega64-loving troll (who shall remain nameless for now), the technical director is now in the process of updating our WordPress installation and adding some security plugins.

I apologize in advance for any interruptions to service or the site, and suggest that if you want to complain to anyone, you can feel free to go over to the Mega64 forums and politely ask people to knock it off.

Some Anthropological Observations on the Subset of Mega64 Fans Who Came to Our Site

Posted By on November 7, 2010

Behind a cut to spare actual Zombie Rights enthusiasts the need to read anymore of the (admittedly hilarious) Mega64 trolling issue, seen previously here and here.

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Wow, Lots of Dumb Responses to Mega64 Piece

Posted By on November 6, 2010

We got a ton of responses to the Mega 64 piece I put up yesterday, and I have to say:

“Grow up, you mouth-breathing cretins.”

When we got back this evening from our trip to the Drunken Zombie Film Festival I saw dozens of comments in the queue and my first thought was, ‘Gee, I was pretty harsh there, I wonder if I’ve stirred up a hornet’s nest for nothing.’

I mean, it’s not like Mega64 is George Romero or John Russo or Lucio Fulci. We already have arch-nemeses.

Reading the comments though, I feel less conciliatory. Most (though not all) are crude and juvenile insults, often using vile slurs… not slurs against Zombies, but against ethnic minorities or sexual orientations.

Which is really on-point, people.

I was going to censor the most disgusting comments, but after talking with the art director, I’ve decided to leave them up. It’s a perfect testament to the staggering immaturity and stupidity of the audience that I’ve apparently offended.

Good show making yourselves look like idiots.

The New Zombie Rights Campaign Rating System

Posted By on November 5, 2010

Here at The Zombie Rights Campaign we have long striven to bring you in-depth analysis of the latest trends and threats facing the Differently Animated both here in America and abroad. A large part of that noble endeavor has necessarily constituted of the review of works in popular media and scholarship for their content as relates to the issues of Zombie Rights and Undead Equality. However, in recent weeks it has become apparent to me that the ZRC needed a simpler yet more objectively rigorous, systematic approach toward appraising these cultural works and objects.

Thus within the ZRC media labs we have been hard at work developing a new system to evaluate and communicate the relative Zombie Friendliness (or, unfortunately, the lack thereof) in a given piece of media, and to relate this rating to the public in a more digestible and timely fashion.

Have no fear, dedicated scholars of Zombie Liberation; the ZRC shall continue to provide lengthy critical analysis of many works, integrated into the new system. At the same time, though, our new and streamlined process will allow you, the reader, to obtain vital information with a mere glance, and us to place a given work in the greater cultural zeitgeist so as to appraise its relative appropriateness to The Cause with greater ease.

Now, on to the new ratings!

Zombie Friendly: The Way to Be!

The Zombie Friendly Rating is applied to works that meet the ZRC’s strict standards for portrayals of the Differently Animated in all regards and present a truly nuanced and empathetic look at the plight of the Differently Animated, to the extent applicable in the medium and context. A Zombie Friendly rating does not imply appropriateness for all ages and audiences; rather, it says that, on the issue of Zombies, you will get a fair hearing and a sympathetic ear from the creators of this particular work or product.

Notable Examples: Creepshow, Atomic Age Cinema 2: Atomic Boogaloo, Fallout 3

Zombie Tolerant: Beats a swift kick in the head!

The Zombie Tolerant Rating reflects a creative work where Zombies are treated without particular rancor, but with perhaps insufficient sensitivity or compassion. Minimal ignorance and prejudice might have filtered into the final product, or negative stereotypes incorrectly informed its plot or characterization, without actual malice being present. The people behind a Zombie Tolerant work tried hard, but still fell short of the goal somehow.

Examples: Deadpool Merc with a Mouth, George’s Intervention (a Dark Carnival 2009 Alumnus and pretty solid film)

Zombie Neutral: It could be worse (and often is)

The Zombie Neutral rating applies to both creative works that feature Zombies in neither a particularly negative nor positive light as well as those that lack meaningful Zombie participation, without going out of their way to avoid the Differently Animated (ala the absence of minority actors in 50s sitcoms) and thus becoming a whitewash of the problems in our society. Anything from a product with only passing mentions of the Undead to a nature documentary on rattlesnakes might fall under this classification, though in general we won’t go out of our own way to review media with no connection to The Cause.

Examples: Madworld (video game), The Loving Dead (short film at last year’s Dark Carnival)

Anti-Zombie: Not Friendly At All, Really

The Anti-Zombie rating is given to works that are truly offensive to the Differently Animated, featuring hateful stereotypes and rampant prejudice against Zombies (without becoming so grossly distasteful as to receive our LS rating) Tasteless jokes about brain-eating, casual violence against the Undead, an almost complete lack of empathy, cruelty and mockery are all present in your typical Anti-Zombie creative work. Anti-Zombie works are sometimes slightly leavened with a tiny amount of sympathy for the Undead, or the notion of a peaceful ‘separate but equal’ existence apart from the Undead.

The ZRC recommends avoiding an Anti-Zombie product; we specifically watch/read/play these things so that you don’t have to, after all.

Examples: Plants vs Zombies, Shaun of the Dead, The Littlest Zombie (comic book)

Living Supremacist: Uggh

Works rated Living Supremacist are, in regard to Zombie Rights, the very worst of the worst. Not just hateful, as in Anti-Zombie rated products, Living Supremacist media go beyond urging that you hate and fear the Undead into agitating toward their complete subjugation or annihilation. Common themes amongst items rated LS include the ‘Zombie Apocalypse’ full of unthinking, unfeeling automatons dedicated to your messy destruction, and/or the ‘Us or Them’ zero sum game where, by the very nature of Zombification, one side or the other must necessarily be annihilated. Zombies found in LS works are utterly inhuman and treated as being beneath contempt.

If something is rated LS then we urge you in the strongest possible terms to avoid supporting it with your time and money, but if you must, the ZRC implores you to please keep these dangerous works out of the hands of children and other impressionable individuals.

Examples: Any of George Romero’s ‘Living Dead’ movies; Return of the Living Dead 1 and 2; Resident Evil (all), Left 4 Dead, 28 Days Later and many, many others

Finally, for works that are yet to be rated, particularly those longer creative forms like videogames that the ZRC might wish to discuss while a review is in progress, we have the Pending rating, which indicates that the material being discussed is.. pending a rating. Pretty simple really.

Pending: We're getting to it!

This system is still a work in progress of course, but we here at The Zombie Rights Campaign feel that it represents a great step forward toward standardizing the process of rating creative material for its Zombie-related content, and hope to one day see it prominently used, in the manner of the MPAA or ESRB ratings, to help patrons make informed choices with how they spend their time and money.

To that end, anyone whose work has received an official ZRC rating receives from the Zombie Rights Campaign a waiver to use the applicable ratings image to promote the rated work to (or warn off) potential consumers; this necessarily includes commercial works.

Higher resolution images of these ratings will be posted soon for use in this fashion, and additional help is readily available upon request.